Randomness on Wumpa Island
by Flarezap
Summary: Just random stuff that happens on Wumpa Island... Very Interesting
1. The Kiss

Randomness on Wumpa Island

Chapter 1: The Kiss

It was a cool night on Wumpa Island, Coco, Crunch, and Aku Aku were fast asleep, but Crash was tossing and turning in his sleep. He woke up with a shock; he had had the worst dream ever something about a kiss, though now it was at the back of his mind. He walked down stairs and looked in the fridge, there was nothing in there.

"Damn it," he thought. "Just f*cking damn it!"

Crash walked outside and he saw the most peculiar site. A figure was on the beach. "Crying?" Crash wondered. Crash walked up to the figure, and it turned out to be...

Wait for it...

Wait for it...

Wait for it...

Wait for it...

Wait for it...

Wait for it...

Wait for it...

Wait for it...

Wait for it...

Wait for it...

Wait for it...

Wait for it...

Wait for it...

Wait for it...

Wait for it...

_The produces shoot me a "if-you-don't-get- on-with-it-we-will-fire-you-and-hire-some-else" look._

_Fine_

CORTEX!

"Vada vaha?" Crash asked which meant. What are you doing here?

Cortex turned his big square head around and went "AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! IT'S CRASH HE'S COME TO BASH ME UP! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! He then ran all over the island. Literally. After he finished running around the island he came up to Crash and asked.

"What do YOU want?"

Crash repeated what he said one week ago. Yes, it took Cortex a whole week for him to run around Wumpa Island, get over it.

"Oh, you see I was cowering and hiding on the beach because the N-Team kicked me out of the Castle, MY Castle to be exact."

"Badava?" Which meant How come?

"Because they were annoyed with me failing all the time," just then Cortex broke out into a furious amount of sobs and wails. When he was finished Crash said "waba." Which meant Wait here.

5 minutes later Crash came out of the forest carrying two Wumpa fruit, but just as Crash reached Cortex, he tripped over his shoe laces and went crashing lip first into Cortex's lips, and just as they locked lips a white flash illuminated the whole beach and then the N-team came out of the bushes holding a digital camera. "Oh, Cortex I see you and Crash are swapping saliva" Nina remarked, and the rest of the N-team burst out laughing.

"_Cortex and Crash sitting in a tree, K-I-S-S-I-N-G_," N. Gin sang "umm how does the rest of the song go?" he asked N. Tropy. N. Tropy wacked his hand into his forehead but it was the hand that the camera was holding, and when he wacked his head the camera went off and the flash made him dizzy and he went head first into a tree, knocking him out. Any way while this was happening Cortex threw the now sleeping Crash with such force that he ended up on the door step of his house.

"WHAT WERE YOU GUYS DOING?" Cortex yelled

The N-team stoped laughing as soon as Cortex finished. N. Brio was the first to speak.

"We were going to take a picture of you kissing Crash and then put it on your Facebook page"

"You fool!" Nina said, "Why'd you tell him that? Do you want him to kill us all?"

"Neo can't even kill a mindless bandicoot; you think he can kill us?"

"True, true." Nina said

"You fool, I don't even have a facebook page" Cortex told them.

Then N. Tropy woke up "Well we would have made one for you."

Then the beach was then illuminated with red and blue flashes and a copper came out of a boat.

"You five are under arrest for identity theft or something, I don't know I only singed up yesterday"

"Me?" Cortex asked "I was the victim here!"

"Too bad," The cop said, "just get in the boat with the others."

"Fine," said Cortex, as they began the journey to the Jail.

_So that's that, the first Chapter of Randomness On Wumpa Island. The first one to Review gets to choose what the next Chapter will be about, so review. Also I'm not that much of a writer so if you can give me any tips on grammar and stuff it would be greatly appreciated. Also this is my first story on this site. YAY!_

_Flarezap Out!_

_PS. I know where you live so review! _


	2. Cameras

Chapter 2: Cameras

Coco woke up at 10 o'clock; she went downstairs and made herself some pancakes with cherry toppings and a hard boiled egg. She laughed, "Boy, I sure to make myself crack up!" Then she realized that she was cracking the egg when she said that, which made her laugh even more and more. She got up with a smile, wiped a tear from her face and continued eating. 5 minutes later she got up put her empty plates in the dishwasher and went to go see what Crash was doing.

As she walked up to Crash's, Crunch's and Aku Aku's house, she tripped over what seemed to be a body; she got up and saw it was Crash. She tried to wake him up but he was in a deep sleep and would not budge, so she went inside and got out a Wumpa fruit and placed it under Crash's nose. Crash woke up instantly, when he smelt the fruit aroma, he then ate the fruit, and some were a life counter went _*Ding*_

"Oh, Crash your awake now." Coco said while grinning.

"Va," Crash replied.

"So how come you were sleeping on your front step? You do know that Cortex once put a flaming bag of poop there."

Crash got up, pressed R2 and ran inside to have a shower.

"Stop breaking the fourth wall, Narrator!" Coco exclaimed.

"You just did it then," the Narrator said.

"What are you? A wise guy? I know how to deal with wise guys..." Coco said

Anyways, back to the story, Crash finished his shower and went outside with Coco and explained what happened last night.

"OMG, YOU kissed Cortex? That's disgusting, but also very funny. I've got to see this.

Crash was about to open his mouth when Coco said "In case you're wondering I placed cameras all over the island, ever since The Incident." Coco said the last part dramatically. For those of you who are wondering what The Incident is, it is so disgusting that even the most mature person in the worlds would find it disgusting, it is so disgusting that no one is ever allowed to speak about it. Just now I could go to jail for telling you about it, but let us move on shall we?

The siblings made their way to Cocos garage, where around 200 TV's were placed around the walls. One TV showed Crunch playing with Barbie dolls, and another one showed Aku Aku making out to a tree. Yes Wumpa Island had some very weird inhabitants. Anyway, Coco went to the TV labelled Beach camera number #23. She re-winded the tape to when Crash came out of the forest and tripped. They then saw the rest until the police came and arrested The N-Team. Then they watched Crunch play with his dolls and they laughed and laughed, but little did they know Wumpa Island was about to get very, very weird.

_Authors note: Hey guys wazzz up?_ _Chapter 2 is now done and get ready for a long time without me updating. Why? Because, Term 4 of school starts on Monday, and by the way I live in Australia, so yeah. Also Bonus Points for the ones who can spot the Family Guy and CoTT references I put in!_

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Flarezap :)

P.S: That's briary fools...

P.S.S: The police are coming to my house, I better get out my sniper...

P.S.S.S: Sorry for the lenght of the story, kinda a filler.


	3. Why Do I Have to Open My Big Mouth?

_Authors Note: Missile Head,Brio and Time Freak's names have been erased from the doccument because the site doesnt like them so there for thre names shall be Gin,Brio and Tropy, okay?_

Chapter 3: Why do I Have to Open My Big Mouth?

It was just about 10, Cortex was sitting in a jail cell, the cell itself was a square; it had a bench for sitting on one side of it a toilet on the other side of the cell with a sink and a window with bars letting the only light in.

"Just your average, every day typical jail cell," Cortex sighed.

He looked around and saw Time Freak picking his nose with his turning stick, Brio was in the corner sipping his mutagen (I think that's how you spell it) drink quietly in the corner and Nina was playing pat-a-cake with Missile Head, Cortex sighed again and said, "come on guys there must be away to get out of here, think let's put our heads together!" the N team wasn't listening and continued what they were doing.

"Fine, I'll just use my head to get us out of here," Cortex sighed.

The 4 villains looked at Cortex, smiled deviously and proceeded towards him.

"Oh, for the love of..." Cortex said

* * *

Uka Uka woke up from his sleep startled that he hadn't had Cortex run up to his bed asking him to sleep with him, he walked down stairs and made himself some Sunshine Flakes Cereal, he then realized that there wasn't any explosions nor was there any crying and screaming.

"The N-Team must be out somewhere." Uka Uka said, but anyway that was good, it meant that he could get some beauty sleep.

"Flarezap is asking for some serious punishment, HOW DARE YOU MAKE ME DO THAT!" Uka Uka screamed into nowhere.

"HAHAHAHA, I can make you do whatever I want, I am the almighty author!" I said.

"Whatever, spastic,"

"WHAT DID YOU SAY!"

"Nothing, oh great and almighty author," Uka Uka said with his fingers crossed, which is what he would have done if he had fingers.

"Good and I know you're not lying because you don't have fingers,"

"Just go back to writing and let me eat in peace," Uka Uka said.

Anyways back to the story.

* * *

The N-Team had strapped Cortex up, and was using his abnormally large head as a battering ram to get through the wall, but they were failing much to Cortex's dismay, each hit was pure agony for the big-headed man.

"Mummy, the elephant jumped on the piano and squashed ," Cortex gabled on and on.

"What's he talking about now?" Nina asked

"I don't know he must be talking about a suppressed memory from long ago thats causing a brain tumour," Tropy said," but who cares?"

"Mmmmm," Nina agreed.

So after 2 hours of pounding on the concrete wall they finally got out and so they then ran all the way to Cortex Castle, except for cortex who had to be carried by Brio. They arrived at Cortex Castle, which was actually not in ruins for once.

"!" Cortex squealed "MY CASTLE ITS ACTUALLY NOT IN RUINS FOR ONCE, IMA BE SO HAPPY!"

"Wait a sec, this isn't right, whenever we go out, the castles always in ruins," Brio said, "Let's go inside."

AS they went inside they saw the interior of the castle all destroyed and ripped apart by the minions, Cortex was literally fuming.

"ALRIGHT EVERYONE INTO THE CONFERANCE ROOM! NOW!" Cortex screamed.

_Authors Note: Okay guys and girls, that was chapter 3 please review, your suggestions are what is keeping me from writers block, so yeah review, please. Anyway this was a hard chapter to write for some reason so yeah. Also I need a good plot for the story so if you guys could give me ideas that will be great. _

_Flarezap Out :)_

_No P.S's for today, deal with it. _


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